Exodus – Chapter 22: Protection of Property

Exodus Chapter 21 informed us that God gave Moses and the Israelites many more laws and commandments than the ten that too many Christians want to push in public places.  Yet these others are conveniently ignored.  Why?  Because most of them are crazy!  Exodus Chapter 22 gives us more crazy laws.

“Whoever steals an ox or a sheep and slaughters it or sells it must pay back five head of cattle for the ox and four sheep for the sheep.” – Exodus 22:1

Okay, that’s not crazy.  I can live with this one.  🙂

“If a thief is caught breaking in at night and is struck a fatal blow, the defender is not guilty of bloodshed; but if it happens after sunrise, the defender is guilty of bloodshed.” – Exodus 22:2-3

Okay, this is crazy!  I get that there’s often a question of whether a defender used undue force on a thief, but those questions are not based on where the sun is at in the sky!!!  What follows this are many verses on the care of animals.  Most of these I agree make sense given the time period.  Next comes social responsibility and the crazy comes back in full force!

“If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife.” – Exodus 22:16

WTF?!?!?!  Does the woman have no choice?  I guess not?  The next verse says the father of the woman can refuse, but the woman has no choice.  Misogyny at its finest.

“Do not allow a sorceress to live.” – Exodus 22:18

Um…sorceresses don’t exist, but let’s assume they do.  What about the sorcerers?  Are they allowed to live?  This is another one of these things that comes down to what is between your legs.  Women = bad.  Men = good.  Sigh.

“Anyone who has sexual relations with an animal is to be put to death.” – Exodus 22:19

I agree that anyone having sexual relations with an animal should be punished.  The animal did not consent.  That punishment, however, should not be death.

“Whoever sacrifices to any god other than the Lord must be destroyed.” – Exodus 22:20

An attempt to make the masses fear and obey.

“Do not mistreat or oppress a foreigner, for you were foreigners in Egypt.” – Exodus 22:21

I can live with this one.  We should never mistreat or oppress others.  Christians should read this verse and live by it.

“You must give me the firstborn of your sons.  Do the same with your cattle and your sheep. Let them stay with their mothers for seven days, but give them to me on the eighth day.” – Exodus 22:29-30

Fuck you God, you’re not getting my firstborn son!!!

“You are to be my holy people. So do not eat the meat of an animal torn by wild beasts; throw it to the dogs.” – Exodus 22:31

Yes, because what makes one holy is not eating animal meat torn by wild beasts.  WTF?

To sum up Exodus 22, there are many, many rules God commanded of the Israelites.  What society calls the ten commandments are simply the first ten.  There’s nothing special about them.  Yet Christians love to ignore the rest, because they have never read them or they pick and choose and ignore the ones they don’t like.  God is not done handing down rules.  We have MANY more to go.

Coming Soon:  Exodus – Chapter 23:  Laws of Justice and Mercy

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