Leviticus 22 – Chapter 22: Rules for the Priest Part II

Leviticus 22 picks up were Leviticus 21 ended, with rules for the priests.  God loved the Israelites so much he gave the priests rules to follow.  Unfortunately for mankind, none of those rules told priests not to rape little boys.

“For the generations to come, if any of your descendants is ceremonially unclean and yet comes near the sacred offerings that the Israelites consecrate to the Lord, that person must be cut off from my presence. I am the Lord.” – Leviticus 22:4

God really does not like unclean people!

“When the sun goes down, he will be clean, and after that he may eat the sacred offerings, for they are his food.” – Leviticus 22:7

What is it with the sun that causes people to go from unclean to clean?  What happens if the moon is out?  The moon is reflected sunlight, so are people still unclean if the moon is out reflecting sunlight to Earth’s surface?

“But if a priest buys a slave with money, or if slaves are born in his household, they may eat his food.” – Leviticus 22:11

God condones slavery.  He’s nice about it, however, and allows the slave to eat!

“If a priest’s daughter marries anyone other than a priest, she may not eat any of the sacred contributions.” – Leviticus 22:12

Not only is a priest’s daughter defiled for life if she has sex, but she MUST marry another priest or lose out in eating the sacred food.  Wow.  God really hates women!

“You must present a male without defect from the cattle, sheep or goats in order that it may be accepted on your behalf.” – Leviticus 22:19

Even female sacrifices do not meet God’s demands.  All sacrifices must be male!

“Do not offer to the Lord the blind, the injured or the maimed, or anything with warts or festering or running sores.” – Leviticus 22:22

Just as God hates the disabled people, he hates disabled animals.

“You must not offer to the Lord an animal whose testicles are bruised, crushed, torn or cut. You must not do this in your own land, 25 and you must not accept such animals from the hand of a foreigner and offer them as the food of your God.” – Leviticus 22:24-25

God really does NOT like damaged testicles.  LOL!

“Do not slaughter a cow or a sheep and its young on the same day.” – Leviticus 22:28

Yes, because one must suffer the loss of the other for at least one full day before also being slaughtered.

“It must be eaten that same day; leave none of it till morning. I am the Lord.” – Leviticus 22:30

Yes, for I am the Lord and I say fuck you to leftovers!  🙂

To sum up Leviticus 22, God sends down more laws for the priests.  Most are related to being clean and unclean, but many are misogynist, preferring males to females.  God doesn’t like damaged testicles nor does he like leftovers.  🙂

Coming Soon:  Leviticus – Chapter 23:  The Appointed Festivals

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