1 Chronicles – Chapter 4: Other Clans of Judah

Another chapter in 1 Chronicles, another listing of descendants.  This chapter focuses on the descendants of Judah and the descendants of Simeon.

“The men whose names were listed came in the days of Hezekiah king of Judah. They attacked the Hamites in their dwellings and also the Meunites who were there and completely destroyed them, as is evident to this day.” – 1 Chronicles 4:41

Even in a chapter listing descendants, the authors couldn’t resist from including a statement on killing.

“They killed the remaining Amalekites who had escaped, and they have lived there to this day.” – 1 Chronicles 4:43

Woohoo!  They lived in the land to this day, residing in the place of those they killed and land they stole.  Super moral!  😊

That concludes this chapter of 1 Chronicles.  More descendants to come in the next chapter!

Coming Soon:  1 Chronicles – Chapter 5:  Reuben

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Matthew 19:9

Tuesdays are great because each Tuesday is a brand new Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday.  Today’s verse comes from the New Testament and directly from the mouth of Jesus.  It’s a mix of sex and misogyny and words today that are ignored by most Christians!

“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” – Matthew 19:9

A man cannot divorce a woman for any reason except sexual immorality.  In other words, a marriage can be dissolved if a woman sleeps around.  But what if a man does the same?  Jesus says nothing on this.  Apparently, it’s okay for men to sleep around.  The verse also discusses nothing about consent.  What if husband and wife agree to this?  Is it wrong?  In my opinion no.  Per the Bible, however, only God can give consent and he often does when he wants to kill you.  🙂

Moreover, most Christians don’t follow the words of Jesus spoken in this verse.  Many Christians (and non-Christians to be fair) are divorced.  Many of those divorces have nothing to do with infidelity.  Yet the Bible demands those people to remain in unhappy marriages.  Great for family values, right?  You must remain unhappy!  There are many pastors/preachers/priests who are divorced and re-married.  And those who are not divorced often don’t care that others are divorced and re-married.  That is a good thing.  It shows society is much more moral than God/Jesus.  On the other hand, it’s hypocritical for Christians to demand we follow some verses, but not others.

Introduction to 1 Chronicles

You might be wondering what is going on.  After all, I’m nowhere near finished reading through 2 Samuel.  So why am I moving on to a different chapter.  My goal is to read and discuss each chapter in chronological order, or as close to chronological order as scholars agree on.  2 Samuel and 1 Chronicles are very similar in time period, so I’ll be switching and forth between 2 Samuel and 1 Chronicles, with a few chapters of Psalms sprinkled in.

1 Chronicles actually begins with Saul but quickly advances forward in years to the time of Saul, David, and Solomon, David’s son.  1 Chronicles as a similar theme to 1 Samuel and 2 Samuel in that God is actively involved in making rules, killing people, and commanding David and others to kill people.  If you thought this was a murder free book, you were wrong.  There’s plenty of murder, including murder of innocents in this book too.

To sum it all up, more of the same.

Psalms – Chapter 21: For the director of music. A psalm of David.

Our last look into Psalms was one big WTF moment.  A literal WTF moment as I used WTF four times!  So what’s the over/under on the number of WTFs I use in this chapter!  🙂

“You have granted him his heart’s desire and have not withheld the request of his lips.” – Psalms 21:2

God needs a mortal man to grant his heart’s desire?  Not much of a god if that’s the case.

“You came to greet him with rich blessings and placed a crown of pure gold on his head.” – Psalms 21:3

How do you place a gold crown on a head that never makes an appearance?

“The Lord will swallow them up in his wrath, and his fire will consume them.” – Psalms 21:9

But remember, God loves you!

“You will destroy their descendants from the earth, their posterity from mankind.” – Psalms 21:10

Yes, because nothing is more moral than killing those who are innocent.

Okay, so not as many WTFs in this chapter.  In fact, I didn’t use any, unless you count the four I used at the beginning when I was describing the WTF moments of Psalms 19.  Do those count?  Yeah, why not.  I’m sure I could have used some WTFs in this chapter too.  J

Coming Soon:  1 Chronicles – Chapter 1:  Historical Records From Adam to Abraham

Psalms – Chapter 19: For the director of music. A psalm of David.

In the last two chapters of Psalms we looked at, David called non-believers fools.  Will this be the third chapter in a row?

“Day after day they (heavens) pour forth speech; night after night they reveal knowledge.” – Psalms 19:2

I’ve never heard the heavens speak, let alone provide knowledge.  Have you?

“They have no speech, they use no words; no sound is heard from them.” – Psalms 19:3

ROFL!  One verse after stating the heavens speak the Bible says they don’t speak!  ROFL!

“It is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, like a champion rejoicing to run his course.” – Psalms 19:5

WTF?  No it’s not!!!

“The law of the Lord is perfect, refreshing the soul.” – Psalms 19:7

The Lord’s laws to kill babies and children are perfect?  What kind of god is this and who in their right mind would say these laws are perfect?  They’re not perfect, they’re horrible!!!  WTF?

“The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever.” – Psalms 19:9

Yes, because the best way to show one’s love is to make others fear you.  WTF?

“They (Lord’s decrees) are more precious than gold, than much pure gold, they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the honeycomb.” – Psalms 19:10

Those decrees on killing people are sweeter than honey?  WTF?

There are a few more verses after this in which David asks God to protect him.  Basically this chapter in Psalms is one big WTF moment.  In fact, I used WTF four times in my discussion above and could probably add a few more if I looked and wrote about EACH verse.  The Lord’s laws, including those that order the murder of children and babies, are perfect?  How could anyone worship a god that declares murder perfect?  WTF?!?!?!

Coming Soon:  Psalms – Chapter 21:  For the director of music. A psalm of David.

Mark 14:51-52

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday!!!  Today’s verses focus on a naked man running away.  Yes, you read that right.  A naked man running away!

“A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, he fled naked, leaving his garment behind.” – Mark 14:51-52

What makes this crazy is how weird it is to read this in the Bible, a book that supposedly teaches people morals.  Many Christians say you can only get your morals from God and the Bible.  So what moral does this teach us?  Wear clothing that comes off easily in case someone grabs you so you can easily escape?  It seems to me the Bible, if intended to teach morals, should focus more on real morals and less on naked people.  But hey, I’m just a Satan worshiping heathen!  🙂