David is dead and the reign of Solomon as leader of the Israelites has begun. Very soon I’ll discuss the first chapter of the book of 1 Kings, but first let me provide a brief intro of what to expect in 1 Kings.
1 Kings presents a history of Israel from the time of David’s death forward for a handful of centuries. Supposedly this book was written by Jeremiah, a prophet, but as always, we really have no idea who wrote most chapters in the Bible, so it’s ridiculous to claim a specific person wrote the book.
Basically what we’ll see in this book is several chapters devoted to God taking care of the Israelites, then the Israelites doing something stupid/wrong in the eyes of God, followed by God reigning destruction on the Israelites. In other words we’ll see God at his asshole best.
Stay tuned. In two days I’ll post my discussion on the first chapter of 1 Kings.
It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and today’s selection is a classic example of God attacking the wrong people.
“When any of the Israelites or any foreigner residing in Israel separate themselves from me and set up idols in their hearts and put a wicked stumbling block before their faces and then go to a prophet to inquire of me, I the Lord will answer them myself. I will set my face against them and make them an example and a byword. I will remove them from my people. Then you will know that I am the Lord.” – Ezekiel 14:7-8
It’s no surprise this god would kill those not worshipping him. After all, the god of the Bible shows us time and time again he is a vengeful, jealous, and irrational god. What’s crazy is how stupid this god is on this issue. So the people are worshipping other idols and you don’t like that. Why kill the people? If you’re an all-powerful god, then destroy the idols and destroy them for good. Take away any possible thought of an idol. That’s all this would take. Who’s the idiot here? God.
Where the previous chapter in Psalms was very short, this one is longer, so let’s get started.
“Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; his love endures forever.” – Psalm 118:1
Except for when God kills you.
“The Lord is with me; he is my helper. I look in triumph on my enemies.” – Psalm 118:7
Will you still look in triumph when those enemies thrust a spear through your belly?
“It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in humans.” – Psalm 118:8
For fuck’s sake? Seriously? Humans are far more trustful than a vengeful god.
“The Lord’s right hand has done mighty things!” – Psalm 118:15
Fine. I’ll give God credit for knowing how to jack off with his right hand.
“The Lord has chastened me severely, but he has not given me over to death.” – Psalm 118:18
How loving of this god.
“Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.” – Psalm 118:26
ROFL! You can be blessed if only you shout out the Lord’s name when in the throes of orgasmic passion!
I think I’ll end with that verse. LOL! Let me just say that I’m getting sick of Psalms, so a good sex joke is a great way to end today’s discussion on this chapter.
Coming Soon: 1 Kings – Chapter 1: Adonijah Sets Himself Up as King
I love Rowan Atkinson in the role of Mr. Bean and I love this quote.
“What is wrong with inciting intense dislike of a religion if the activities or teachings of that religion are so outrageous, irrational or abusive of human rights that they deserve to be intensely disliked?” – Rowan Atkinson
Nothing. Nothing is wrong with inciting intense dislike of a religion when that religion does irreparable harm to others.
Today’s chapter, Psalm 117, is very short, so here’s the chapter in its totality.
“Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol him, all you peoples. For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures forever. Praise the Lord.” – Psalm 117:1-2
That’s it. But let’s be honest. The Bible shows us God cares more about our fear of him than love. This is a man-made make believe God created to control the masses. There’s no love here.
Coming Soon: Psalm – Chapter 118: Untitled
Our quest through the untitled chapters in Psalms continues today with chapter 116.
“I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy.” – Psalm 116:1
If the Lord listens, he often chooses to do nothing in response. I’m sure lots of women being raped and children being murdered called out to God only to have their calls unanswered.
“The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion.” – Psalm 116:5
BAHAHAHAHA!!! What a crock of shit! The Bible refutes this claim many times! God is vengeful and jealous. He’s not compassionate.
“Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his faithful servants.” – Psalm 116:15
God finds your death precious. Um…
Ug. More lies in the book of Psalms. Lies easily refuted by the Bible itself if only Christians would read it.
Coming Soon: Psalm – Chapter 117: Untitled
It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and today’s verse comes from the book of 2 John, and it’s a verse that teaches hate.
“If anyone comes to you and does not bring this teaching, do not take them into your house or welcome them.” – 2 John 10
If someone comes to you and that person isn’t a Christian, the Bible instructs you to toss them out of your house or shoo them away. In other words, if someone who is different from you comes toward you, you are to fill yourself with hate and turn them away. Biblical morals? This is pretty typical for the Bible but it’s not a moral to live your life by. This verse teaches people to hate each other and is too often used to condemn those who don’t follow the same religion as you. Simply disgusting.