Isaiah – Chapter 44: Israel the Chosen

God has chosen Israel in this chapter. All is good forever, right? Let’s find out.

“For I will pour water on the thirsty land, and streams on the dry ground;I will pour out my Spirit on your offspring, and my blessing on your descendants.” – Isaiah 44:3

Great, except God is the one who created evil and God has multiple times caused the very drought that he is now fixing. This is only necessary because God has caused harm countless times.

“I am the first and I am the last; apart from me there is no God.” – Isaiah 44:6

God could easily make this clear by simply showing himself instead of using prophets to pass along his message. Imagine how easy it would be for God to achieve all he wanted if only he’d show himself to the people. Instead, this God demands you stop thinking for yourself.

“No one stops to think, no one has the knowledge or understanding to say” – Isaiah 44:19

God only wants you to think if you can for certainty say that your thinking will lead to your worship of God. God doesn’t want you to think because you’ll see through his ruse.

The chapter continues on with Isaiah saying how great God is and how God ends false prophets. Of course Isaiah is going to say these things so he can be seen as a true prophet. Again, God, if he was real, would know this is not the best way to make believers out of people. God would come forth and show himself. If he did, EVERYONE would be a true believer.

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 45: Untitled

Isaiah – Chapter 43: Israel’s Only Savior

Time to discover who Israel’s only savior is! Hint: It’s God! 🙂

“Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” – Isaiah 43:1

The you are mine part of this statement is straight out of a horror movie.

“When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.” – Isaiah 43:2

Advice NO ONE SHOULD EVER TAKE!!!

“Do not be afraid, for I am with you;” – Isaiah 43:5

Until I’m not and then I’ll (God) will kill you.

“Before me no god was formed,  nor will there be one after me.” – Isaiah 43:10

Except of course, the Christian god who was also created by humans.

“I, even I, am the Lord, and apart from me there is no savior.” – Isaiah 43:11

God thinks pretty highly of himself.

“You have not brought me sheep for burnt offerings, nor honored me with your sacrifices.” – Isaiah 43:23

Oh no, never fuck with God’s burnt offerings!!!

“But you have burdened me with your sins and wearied me with your offenses.” – Isaiah 43:24

How is it possible for an all-powerful, all-knowing god to be burdened by human sins?

God is a petty being. That’s all for this chapter.

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 44: Israel the Chosen

Malachi 1:3

Sometimes God is just ridiculous, thus the need for a Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday post each week.

“but Esau I have hated, and I have turned his hill country into a wasteland and left his inheritance to the desert jackals.” – Malachi 1:3

Well there goes Esau’s inheritance! My favorite part about this verse is that in the King James Version of the Bible, desert jackals is replaced with ‘dragons of the wilderness’. Dragons in the Bible! 🙂

Isaiah – Chapter 42: The Servant of the Lord

I’m going to be blunt today. Time for more bullshit from Isaiah.

“Here is my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen one in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit on him, and he will bring justice to the nations.” – Isaiah 42:1

This is one unlucky dude (Jesus) to have this forced on him.

“I am the Lord; that is my name!” – Isaiah 42:8

Um…thanks for the reminder…I guess. 🙂

“I will lay waste the mountains and hills and dry up all their vegetation; I will turn rivers into islands  and dry up the pools.” – Isaiah 42:15

This is why in the previous chapter God shouldn’t get credit for letting the waters run again. He’s the one who turned off the water in the first place. 

“So he poured out on them his burning anger, the violence of war.” – Isaiah 42:25

Don’t forget. God loves you! 🙂

God’s an asshole. Nothing else to really say here.

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 43: Israel’s Only Savior

Isaiah – Chapter 41: The Helper of Israel

In the last chapter of Isaiah we were told God is good, caring, and loving, and will care for you forever. Except all those times the Bible told us he won’t. SMH. Let’s see what this chapter has in store for us. 

“He turns them to dust with his sword,  to windblown chaff with his bow.” – Isaiah 41:2

The ‘He’ in this sentence is God. So much for the caring and loving god of the last chapter.

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.” – Isaiah 41:10

Oh, so now God doesn’t want us to fear? Goes against the same God who demands your fear.

“I will make rivers flow on barren heights, and springs within the valleys.” – Isaiah 41:18

Does it count when the rivers stopped flowing due to God’s actions? Remember that whole hardening of the hearts thing?

“See, they are all false! Their deeds amount to nothing; their images are but wind and confusion.” – Isaiah 41:29

I agree that all of these idols are false. I just take it one step further and declare that the idol Christians call God is also false.

God keeps saying he is good, but his actions suggest otherwise.

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 42: The Servant of the Lord

Isaiah – Chapter 40: Comfort for God’s People

Today we move back to the book of Isaiah and take a look at the 40th chapter.

“Comfort, comfort my people, says your God.” – Isaiah 40:1

More like death, death my people.

“And the glory of the Lord will be revealed, and all people will see it together.” – Isaiah 40:5

Too late for all the innocent people God had murdered and/or raped.

“All people are like grass, and all their faithfulness is like the flowers of the field. The grass withers and the flowers fall, because the breath of the Lord blows on them.” – Isaiah 40:6-7

This is telling us that people lose their faithfulness because of God.

“See, the Sovereign Lord comes with power, and he rules with a mighty arm.” – Isaiah 40:10

God rules as a violent tyrant would.

“He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.” – Isaiah 40:11

This is a verse Christians love to share, but it contradicts so many verses in the Bible when God does the exact opposite!

“With whom, then, will you compare God?” – Isaiah 40:18

Satan, for one, who was a much nicer dude. He killed far fewer people.

“Why do you complain, Jacob? Why do you say, Israel? ‘My way is hidden from the Lord; my cause is disregarded by my God’”? – Isaiah 40:27

Might have something to do with the murder, rape, and starvation running rampant throughout the land God controls.

What a barf load of a chapter. God is good? God cares? God loves you? It’s easy to say these things, but we have several books prior to this in the Bible that state the exact opposite. God wants your fear! That is not good, caring, nor loving!

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 41: The Helper of Israel

Psalm 109:9

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and nothing is more biblical than punishing kids for the deeds of their parents.

“May his children be fatherless and his wife a widow.” – Psalm 109:9

Suck it up kid. God punished your dad, so now you don’t have a dad and that’s how God intended it. Also, your own kids, grandkids, great grandkids, great-great grandkids, etc. are fucked too. But God loves you!

Psalm – Chapter 76: For the director of music. With stringed instruments. A psalm of Asaph. A song.

Today we take a quick break from Isaiah and move to Psalms for a chapter.

“God is renowned in Judah; in Israel his name is great.” – Psalm – 76:1

Sure he is. God, the greatest murderer in the history of Biblical times is renowned. 

“It is you alone who are to be feared. Who can stand before you when you are angry?” – Psalm 76:7

For the millionth time, evoking fear is never a sign of love.

“Surely your wrath against mankind brings you praise, and the survivors of your wrath are restrained.” – Psalm 76:10

Yes, I’m sure the survivors of God’s wrath are praising him. They’re cowering in fear from this child abuser.

To conclude, God’s fear is not a sign of his greatness. It’s a sign he’s a child abuser, domestic abuser, and a horrible being, including all real and fake beings ever conceived in all of time. 

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 40: Comfort for God’s People