2 Samuel 12:24

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and Today’s verse is on the topic of sex.

“Then David comforted his wife Bathsheba, and he went to her and made love to her. She gave birth to a son, and they named him Solomon.” – 2 Samuel 12:24

At first glance there is nothing wrong with this verse. Set aside the fact David had multiple wives and concubines, it is perfectly normal for a husband and wife to have sex and become pregnant. The difference here is the context. This is immediately after their son is killed. David has sex with his wife to comfort her over her dead son. For fuck’s sake. Making a baby isn’t the same as picking out the next dog when yours dies. Biblical romance. 🙂

Psalm – Chapter 46: For the director of music. Of the Sons of Korah. According to alamoth. A song.

Today we switch over to Psalm, taking a close look at the 46th chapter. 

“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” – Psalm 46:1

After awhile it gets old saying this, but the Bible clearly shows that God is only present when he chooses to be, which is usually only when it is convenient for the male authors of the Bible.

“Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam  and the mountains quake with their surging.” – Psalm 46:2-3

Show me a person who isn’t afraid in the middle of a large earthquake and I’ll show you a liar.

“Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall; he lifts his voice, the earth melts.” – Psalm 46:6

In an attempt to supposedly help the people, God melts the earth, completely forgetting that he created humans who can’t swim in lava. 🙂

“Come and see what the Lord has done, the desolations he has brought on the earth.” – Psalm 46:8

God’s desolations are supposed to convince us that God is good?

“He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth.” – Psalm 46:9

Sorry, but you can’t receive credit for fixing what you knowingly caused.

“The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.” – Psalm 46:11

Are you sure about that because it doesn’t seem like it!

In this chapter God has melted the Earth and ended all the wars he started. Yay? I guess? 🙂 Maybe the people of biblical times floated in lava and didn’t burn. Hmmm….

Coming Soon: Psalm – Chapter 80: For the director of music. To the tune of “The Lilies of the Covenant.” Of Asaph. A psalm.