Psalms – Chapter 21: For the director of music. A psalm of David.

Our last look into Psalms was one big WTF moment.  A literal WTF moment as I used WTF four times!  So what’s the over/under on the number of WTFs I use in this chapter!  🙂

“You have granted him his heart’s desire and have not withheld the request of his lips.” – Psalms 21:2

God needs a mortal man to grant his heart’s desire?  Not much of a god if that’s the case.

“You came to greet him with rich blessings and placed a crown of pure gold on his head.” – Psalms 21:3

How do you place a gold crown on a head that never makes an appearance?

“The Lord will swallow them up in his wrath, and his fire will consume them.” – Psalms 21:9

But remember, God loves you!

“You will destroy their descendants from the earth, their posterity from mankind.” – Psalms 21:10

Yes, because nothing is more moral than killing those who are innocent.

Okay, so not as many WTFs in this chapter.  In fact, I didn’t use any, unless you count the four I used at the beginning when I was describing the WTF moments of Psalms 19.  Do those count?  Yeah, why not.  I’m sure I could have used some WTFs in this chapter too.  J

Coming Soon:  1 Chronicles – Chapter 1:  Historical Records From Adam to Abraham

Psalms – Chapter 19: For the director of music. A psalm of David.

In the last two chapters of Psalms we looked at, David called non-believers fools.  Will this be the third chapter in a row?

“Day after day they (heavens) pour forth speech; night after night they reveal knowledge.” – Psalms 19:2

I’ve never heard the heavens speak, let alone provide knowledge.  Have you?

“They have no speech, they use no words; no sound is heard from them.” – Psalms 19:3

ROFL!  One verse after stating the heavens speak the Bible says they don’t speak!  ROFL!

“It is like a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, like a champion rejoicing to run his course.” – Psalms 19:5

WTF?  No it’s not!!!

“The law of the Lord is perfect, refreshing the soul.” – Psalms 19:7

The Lord’s laws to kill babies and children are perfect?  What kind of god is this and who in their right mind would say these laws are perfect?  They’re not perfect, they’re horrible!!!  WTF?

“The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever.” – Psalms 19:9

Yes, because the best way to show one’s love is to make others fear you.  WTF?

“They (Lord’s decrees) are more precious than gold, than much pure gold, they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the honeycomb.” – Psalms 19:10

Those decrees on killing people are sweeter than honey?  WTF?

There are a few more verses after this in which David asks God to protect him.  Basically this chapter in Psalms is one big WTF moment.  In fact, I used WTF four times in my discussion above and could probably add a few more if I looked and wrote about EACH verse.  The Lord’s laws, including those that order the murder of children and babies, are perfect?  How could anyone worship a god that declares murder perfect?  WTF?!?!?!

Coming Soon:  Psalms – Chapter 21:  For the director of music. A psalm of David.

Mark 14:51-52

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday!!!  Today’s verses focus on a naked man running away.  Yes, you read that right.  A naked man running away!

“A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, he fled naked, leaving his garment behind.” – Mark 14:51-52

What makes this crazy is how weird it is to read this in the Bible, a book that supposedly teaches people morals.  Many Christians say you can only get your morals from God and the Bible.  So what moral does this teach us?  Wear clothing that comes off easily in case someone grabs you so you can easily escape?  It seems to me the Bible, if intended to teach morals, should focus more on real morals and less on naked people.  But hey, I’m just a Satan worshiping heathen!  🙂

Psalms – Chapter 16: A miktam of David.

Well, that was two chapters in a row in which David called non-believers fools and evildoers.  If by fool you mean a critical thinker, than fine, I’m a fool.  Will there be more attacks on non-believers in Psalms 16?  Let’s find out.

“I say to the Lord, ‘You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing.’” – Psalms 16:2

I can think of a few.  Happiness.  Less murder.  Less raping.  Critical thinking.  No hardening of hearts.  Just to name a few.

“Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure.” – Psalms 16:5

Really?  Because the Israelites have never been secure in the Bible.

“The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.” – Psalms 16:6

David, you are a king, so of course you find it pleasant.  You have everything you could want.  Your slaves on the other hand…

“…because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay.” – Psalms 16:10

All people die and all corpses decay, David.  Even in biblical times one should know this.

Another short chapter in Psalms in which David praises God.  I don’t know about you, but I’m tired of this woe is me talk from David who is richer, as king, than everyone, yet complains life isn’t good enough.  Sigh.

Coming Soon:  Psalms – Chapter 19:  For the director of music. A psalm of David.

Psalms – Chapter 14: For the director of music. Of David.

So Psalms 10 told us that those who do not believe are evil.  Simply not believing makes you evil according to the Bible.  Not a surprise given the Bible was written by men in order to control the masses.  Now it’s time to move into Psalms 14.

“The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’ They are corrupt, their deeds are vile; there is no one who does good.” – Psalms 14:1

More attacks on non-believers.  Sorry David, but the fool is one who doesn’t question.  The fool is one who accepts everything without critical thinking.  You, David, are the fool.

“You evildoers frustrate the plans of the poor, but the Lord is their refuge.” – Psalms 14:6

Um yeah…keep telling yourself that.

And that’s it for this chapter.  More attacks on the unbelievers, or shall I say, the critical thinkers.

Coming Soon:  Psalms – Chapter 16:  A miktam of David.

Psalms – Chapter 10: Untitled

In the last chapter of Psalms David tried to tell us God is just and judges with equity.  LOL!  Will he tell the truth in this chapter?  Doubtful.

“Why, Lord, do you stand far off?  Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” – Psalms 10:1

Because he doesn’t exist.

“In his pride the wicked man does not seek him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God.” – Psalms 10:4

Hmmm…I guess that means I’m wicked.  I have no room for a make believe god in my life.

“He lies in wait near the villages; from ambush he murders the innocent.” – Psalms 10:8

Sigh…the lie that you can’t be good without God.  Because somehow you can only be good if you believe in a god who murders innocents, children, and babies, and rapes women.  Yeah.

“Arise, Lord! Lift up your hand, O God. Do not forget the helpless.” – Psalms 10:12

Too late.  God forgot the helpless long ago.  Look around.

“The Lord is King for ever and ever; the nations will perish from his land.” – Psalms 10:16

If true, he also brought evil into this world.  David’s entire plea only exists because God created evil.

“You, Lord, hear the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry, defending the fatherless and the oppressed, so that mere earthly mortals will never again strike terror.” – Psalms 10:17-18

God may listen, but he doesn’t do anything to help.  Look around the world.  If there’s a god, he’s not doing anything to help.  Oh yeah, I forgot.  God works in mysterious ways.  Barf.

That concludes Psalms 10.  David basically links not believing in God to immoral and evil behavior.  Sorry, but according to the Bible, God is the one who brought evil to this world.  Not man.  Morality is not made by a book written by men trying to control the masses.

Coming Soon:  Psalms – Chapter 14:  For the director of music. Of David.