2 Chronicles – Chapter 31: Contributions for Worship

The story of Hezekiah is not over yet. It continues in 2 Chronicles 31.

“When all this had ended, the Israelites who were there went out to the towns of Judah, smashed the sacred stones and cut down the Asherah poles.” – 2 Chronicles 31:1

I find it interesting that the very Christians who support this destruction of property are completely against Confederate statues being torn down. When it comes to racism, they always shout out that we shouldn’t destroy history. But when it comes to history of other religions, they are all for destroying it.

“As for the priests, the descendants of Aaron, who lived on the farmlands around their towns or in any other towns, men were designated by name to distribute portions to every male among them and to all who were recorded in the genealogies of the Levites.” – 2 Chronicles 31:19

Fuck the women!

“This is what Hezekiah did throughout Judah, doing what was good and right and faithful before the Lord his God.” – 2 Chronicles 31:20

Sure…based on what we’ve read so far, Hezekiah had a bunch of statues torn down and a bunch of animals slaughtered and burned to satisfy God’s blood lust. What has he done to actually help the people?

Coming Soon: Psalm – Chapter 48: A song. A psalm of the Sons of Korah.

2 Chronicles – Chapter 30: Hezekiah Celebrates the Passover

The story of Hezekiah continues today in 2 Chronicles 30.

“The king and his officials and the whole assembly in Jerusalem decided to celebrate the Passover in the second month.” – 2 Chronicles 30:2

What to do after sacrificing thousands of animals to God? Throw a party!!!

“Do not be like your parents and your fellow Israelites, who were unfaithful to the Lord, the God of their ancestors, so that he made them an object of horror, as you see.” – 2 Chronicles 30:7

Sure…God has the power to make people believe, to show people real signs of his existence, but he doesn’t. Thus when people question and think critically, he kills them all. Sigh.

“The couriers went from town to town in Ephraim and Manasseh, as far as Zebulun, but the people scorned and ridiculed them.” – 2 Chronicles 30:10

As they should! You would do the same if couriers knocked on your door to share religion with you. In fact, you already probably do it when Mormon’s or Jehovah Witnesses knock on the door!

“Since many in the crowd had not consecrated themselves, the Levites had to kill the Passover lambs for all those who were not ceremonially clean and could not consecrate their lambs to the Lord.” – 2 Chronicles 30:17

More stupid rules from God. Some of the Levites were not clean so lambs had to be killed. What…the…fuck?!?!?!?

“There was great joy in Jerusalem, for since the days of Solomon son of David king of Israel there had been nothing like this in Jerusalem.” – 2 Chronicles 30:26

We killed lots of animals to satisfy God’s blood lust. Woohoo!!!

The Bible has become very repetitive in these chapters. It starts with kings God likes and then goes to kings God doesn’t like and then switches back and forth. What’s the real problem in all of this? It’s not the people. The problem is God.

Coming Soon: 2 Chronicles – Chapter 31: Contributions for Worship

2 Chronicles – Chapter 29: Hezekiah Purifies the Temple

Today we shift back to 2 Chronicles. This chapter is similar to 2 Kings 8 and talks about King Hezekiah.

“And he did that which was right in the sight of the Lord, according to all that David his father had done.” – 2 Chronicles 29:2

David had hundreds to thousands of wives and concubines. Traditional biblical marriage at its best. 🙂

“He in the first year of his reign, in the first month, opened the doors of the house of the Lord, and repaired them.” – 2 Chronicles 29:3

But God is petty, so all you have to do is kiss his ass and he loves you. Doesn’t matter if you are a truly moral person. Say nice things to God and he’ll love you.

“Then they went in to King Hezekiah and reported: ‘We have purified the entire temple of the Lord, the altar of burnt offering with all its utensils, and the table for setting out the consecrated bread, with all its articles.’” – 2 Chronicles 29:18

God likes his shit clean.

“So they slaughtered the bulls, and the priests took the blood and splashed it against the altar; next they slaughtered the rams and splashed their blood against the altar; then they slaughtered the lambs and splashed their blood against the altar.” – 2 Chronicles 29:22

Sounds like a waste of food at a time when too many people are struggling to acquire adequate nourishment. Then again, God was never really about caring for people.

“The number of burnt offerings the assembly brought was seventy bulls, a hundred rams and two hundred male lambs—all of them for burnt offerings to the Lord. The animals consecrated as sacrifices amounted to six hundred bulls and three thousand sheep and goats.” – 2 Chronicles 29:32-33

If you were thinking that maybe only one animal was sacrificed, think again. Thousands of animals were sacrificed!

“So the service of the temple of the Lord was reestablished. Hezekiah and all the people rejoiced at what God had brought about for his people, because it was done so quickly.” – 2 Chronicles 29:35-36

Woohoo! We sacrificed a bunch of animals! We are the best! God loves us now!

This is another in a long line of chapters that clearly show how ridiculous the Bible is when actually read. To make God love you again you have to burn thousands of animals? Seriously? This is who Christians worship?

Coming Soon: 2 Chronicles – Chapter 30: Hezekiah Celebrates the Passover

2 Chronicles 28:6

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and today’s verse comes from the book of 2 Chronicles and one I just discovered yesterday when talking about 2 Chronicles 28.

“In one day Pekah son of Remaliah killed a hundred and twenty thousand soldiers in Judah—because Judah had forsaken the Lord, the God of their ancestors.” – 2 Chronicles 28:6

As I’ve said many times, the Bible would be a much more believable book if it didn’t include so many ridiculous lies. One person killing 120,000 people in one day? Nope! There’s no technology at the time to do that. Even today it’s near impossible for one person to do this. One person with accesses to a nuclear weapon could do it, and the leader of each nuclear capable nation can do that. But nukes don’t exist in Biblical times. Once again, the Bible lies.

2 Chronicles – Chapter 28: Ahaz King of Judah

After a trek through the book of Micah, we move back to 2 Chronicles and pick up where we left off.

“Ahaz was twenty years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem sixteen years. Unlike David his father, he did not do what was right in the eyes of the Lord.” – 2 Chronicles 28:1

Ahaz is in trouble, but let’s be honest, even those kings who did do right in the eyes of the Lord often suffered greatly at the hands of God.

“He burned sacrifices in the Valley of Ben Hinnom and sacrificed his children in the fire, engaging in the detestable practices of the nations the Lord had driven out before the Israelites.” – 2 Chronicles 28:3

Sacrificing your children is pretty horrible, but let us not forget that God commanded Abraham to sacrifice his son. It doesn’t matter that God stopped the sacrifice. Ordered someone to sacrifice your own child is pure evil.

“Therefore the Lord his God delivered him into the hands of the king of Aram. The Arameans defeated him and took many of his people as prisoners and brought them to Damascus.” – 2 Chronicles 28:5

I understand the consequence Ahaz faces, but the people too? Do we know they also built idols? Or maybe they were forced to make the idols against their wishes. Once again God punishes many people who were likely innocent.

“In one day Pekah son of Remaliah killed a hundred and twenty thousand soldiers in Judah—because Judah had forsaken the Lord, the God of their ancestors.” – 2 Chronicles 28:6

Sorry, but one person did not kill 120,000 soldiers in one day given the technology of the time.

“But a prophet of the Lord named Oded was there, and he went out to meet the army when it returned to Samaria. He said to them, ‘Because the Lord, the God of your ancestors, was angry with Judah, he gave them into your hand. But you have slaughtered them in a rage that reaches to heaven.  And now you intend to make the men and women of Judah and Jerusalem your slaves. But aren’t you also guilty of sins against the Lord your God?  Now listen to me! Send back your fellow Israelites you have taken as prisoners, for the Lord’s fierce anger rests on you.’” – 2 Chronicles 28:9-11

Much evil is done here, but it’s hypocritical of God to get upset about slaves when he is the one who has commanded the taking of slaves. Not to mention God’s cowardice at speaking to the people personally.

“Ahaz rested with his ancestors and was buried in the city of Jerusalem, but he was not placed in the tombs of the kings of Israel.” – 2 Chronicles 28:27

Ahaz is punished by not being buried in the tombs of the kings of Israel. No comfort to the innocents who were harmed by God during Ahaz’s reign.

All throughout 2 Chronicles we see good and bad kings. This book would have much greater moral authority if bad kings were truly punished without punishing the innocent at the same time. The book would also have greater authority if God didn’t condemn the very things he supports, such as slavery, killing, etc. Those are bad things. Being a god doesn’t justify God doing them.

Coming Soon: 2 Kings 16: Ahaz King of Judah

2 Chronicles 27: Jotham King of Judah

After a trek through the book of Amos, we move back to 2 Chronicles today.

“He did what was right in the eyes of the Lord, just as his father Uzziah had done, but unlike him he did not enter the temple of the Lord. The people, however, continued their corrupt practices.” – 2 Chronicles 27:2

Jotham does what is right in the eyes of the Lord, but the people are corrupt.

“Jotham grew powerful because he walked steadfastly before the Lord his God.” – 2 Chronicles 27:6

Jotham grows powerful but does nothing to help the people, nor does God. If the people are truly corrupt, God has the power to teach them the rightful ways, but chooses not to.

“He was twenty-five years old when he became king, and he reigned in Jerusalem sixteen years. Jotham rested with his ancestors and was buried in the City of David. And Ahaz his son succeeded him as king.” – 2 Chronicles 27:8-9

And that’s it for Jotham. He only lives to be 41, which is a ripe age for the times, but in Biblical terms, he dies young. Maybe his rightful ways did not sway God.

Not sure what the point of this chapter is, other than to point out another king. Basically the chapter points out that Jotham existed, he was king, and then he died. That’s it.

Coming Soon: Isaiah – Chapter 9: Untitled

2 Chronicles 18:21-22

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and today we see God forcing people to lie to prove his point. Sigh.

“‘I will go and be a deceiving spirit in the mouths of all his prophets,’ he said. ‘You will succeed in enticing him,’ said the Lord. ‘Go and do it.’ ‘So now the Lord has put a deceiving spirit in the mouths of these prophets of yours. The Lord has decreed disaster for you.’” – 2 Chronicles 18:21-22

Much of the Bible focuses on how evil the average person is. God has to punish people because they lie, deceive, murder, etc. But this verse shows us that God is the one forcing the people to lie! So how often are people punished by God because God forced them to lie? Hmm. An evil god, causing people to be evil, so he can punish them for their evil. Biblical morality.