Matthew 4:1

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and today’s verse is…crazy. 🙂

“Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil.” – Matthew 4:1

So let’s get this straight. God is all-knowing and all-powerful. Nothing can trick him. He has a son, Jesus, who is also himself. Its own set of crazy. God then sends his son, himself, into the wilderness to be tempted by Satan as a test of his son, himself. Um…not the actions of an all-knowing and powerful god.

Matthew 6:17-18

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday. Since we’ve talked about fasting recently, let’s pull up a verse from the New Testament on fasting.

“But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face, so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.” – Matthew 6:17-18

Christians are doing their fasting wrong! They need to pour oil on their heads while fasting! Although I’m not sure how an oil covered head makes it less obvious than an oil covered head. If I see someone with oil poured over their head, I’m going to notice whether they are fasting or not! Do you know what is not noticeable? Someone fasting! Unless they are telling you, you can’t tell if someone is fasting or not unless you specifically see them not eating at a meal.

Matthew 1:18-25

Twas the night before Christmas and it was Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday! Today is a lovely story of love between a woman, a man, and the God that raped her.

“This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about]: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, ‘Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.’All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel’ (which means “God with us”). When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife.  But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.” Matthew 1:18-25

Translation: Mary slept with another guy, which is entirely her choice, but Joseph is so clueless that he believes Mary’s story that she’s a virgin and just has no idea how she could possibly have become pregnant. 

Matthew 1:1

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday and today I’ve chosen the first verse in the New Testament.

“This is the genealogy of Jesus the Messiah the son of David, the son of Abraham:” – Matthew 1:1

Why is this crazy? Well, it assumes there is a known genealogy of Jesus. It assumes a Jesus existed when there isn’t strong evidence that is the case. It assumes we have evidence the ancestors of Jesus, if he existed, existed. It assumes we have records, other than the Bible, that any of this ancestor list is true. You’d have to believe a donkey can talk in order to believe this genealogy presented in the Bible is correct.

Matthew 24:37

Last week we took a look at the not-so-nice version of Jesus in the Bible. Today in Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday, we look at another not-so-nice version of Jesus.

“As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.” – Matthew 24:37

Jesus loves you, but he will express that love by killing everyone in a massive flood.

Matthew 10:34-36

It’s Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday! I’ve probably shared this previously on this blog, but it is a good one that shows that Jesus is not the nice, kind, friendly guy Christians make him out to be.

“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to turn ‘a man against his father,  a daughter against her mother, a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—  a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.’” – Matthew 10:34-36

Jesus, the destroyer of families.

Matthew 1:18

This year Christmas and Crazy Bible Verse Tuesday are on the same day. Given the holiday, today’s verse on the virgin birth of Jesus is perfect!

“His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit.” – 1 Matthew 1:18

I’ll be blunt. A virgin birth in humans in IMPOSSIBLE! Sorry, didn’t happen! Mary had sex with someone! Sorry Christians, you are simply wrong. If you believe a virgin birth happened, you have lost all critical thinking ability.